They warned me that I would never be enough. They greedily taunted me that they had all the yellow sunshine, while I had all the black. My eyes would consistently lock with the sky and stay there until tears would escape them. I couldn’t think; my thoughts were on never ending train tracks. I couldn’t sleep, for my eyes felt as they were pried open. I couldn’t sit still. It was as if I was in a moving car that would never stop. I was desperate, so I grabbed my “bicycle” and pedaled to where I would hopefully be happy.
Before I get worried comments, this is not a true story. I wrote from the perspective of a teen that was being bullied and is battling with depression. This teen is tempted to commit suicide. If you have any questions, make sure to comment. Also comment what is your favorite season. I hear there is snow coming to where I live, so obviously mine is winter. Have a wonderful week and make sure to stay positive.
Hi Marissa-
This post features so much raw emotion, which is brought to life with your use of figurative language. I think it was smart to put the disclaimer at the bottom, so your teachers and blog visitors won’t worry. I do think many people relate to these feelings of hopelessness. While it’s not a quick-fix, I do believe that journaling about our emotions helps release them, allowing us to exit the cycle and see the light and hope. 🙂 Keep on making your writing real. 🙂
Mrs. Rombach
Hi Marissa,
I found your story to be very touching and emotional. I thought your descriptive language did an amazing job at capturing the sleepless nights and struggles that many people, unfortunately, face. Great job at incorporating the required words into a piece like this!
-Kaylee from Longwood University
Hi Marissa,
Love the fact that you tried to sent a message to the crowd here, about suicidal people. I thing you achieved that perfectly through emotional, poetic expression. Keep on writing like this!