Two Dimensions

By: Shivani Rajagopal

It is like a mirror reflecting everything, both light and dark,

It is like a gold chalice with elaborate designs filled with poison,

Shading in a piece of art, a mix of neutral colors,

The feeling is a game of tug of war, back and forth you go,

Like clear blue skies, dominated by black clouds within seconds,

It is like every color is tinted with the slightest bit of gray,

It is a beautiful exotic environment invaded by roaring factories spitting out big puffs of harmful smoke,

It is the one missing piece from the puzzle,

A thin, hairline fracture in a vase,

Missing the correct key for a lock,

The glowing, sparkling stars floating in the unknown dark matter,

Biting into candy coated in sugar only to find a salty, sour substance underneath,

It scratches the smooth white surface, leaving behind rips and holes,

Eating at the flesh of an animal like a parasite,

Bittersweetness stabs you in the back like a once close friend

1. I  decided to publish an emotion poem.
2. I chose the emotion of bittersweetness, because it is a feeling that is always present. It shows nothing is completely perfect.
3. The tone of my poem is melancholy or pessimism.
4. The theme of my poem is that  small imperfections can degrade the big picture.
5. “It is like a gold chalice with elaborate designs filled with poison,” this line from the poem is a simile. It describes how the object can be beautiful and elegant, but the poison diminishes its value. This adds to the pessimistic tone, because it focuses in on the negativity(poison). “It scratches the smooth white surface, leaving behind rips and holes,” this second piece of figurative language from the poem is an example of personification. This emotion cannot literally scratch a smooth white surface. It shows that this feeling targets the errors in an object to make you view that object differently. This brings out the gloomy melancholy tone, again bringing focus to all the errors in the white surface.
6. A revision I made was substituting the phrase “A small crack” with ” A thin hairline fracture.” I made this change because “A thin hairline fracture” emphasizes the crack and it paints a detailed picture of the vase in the reader’s mind. “A small crack” is a simple phrase with not much meaning. My second revision was replacing “biting into hard candy” with “biting into candy coated in sugar only to find a salty, sour substance underneath”. This revision is detailed, specific and activates senses like taste and sight.
7. The poem wasn’t easy, but it also wasn’t difficult. It did not require an overwhelming amount of focus or thinking. In my first draft thinking of figurative language and finding the connection between inanimate objects and a specific emotion was different and somewhat challenging. After planning and using techniques like webs and organizers, it became easier to write the poem.
8. I’m pretty satisfied with my poem. I feel like if I picked a different type of poem that could be linked to a specific moment or event my poem would be better, but I feel like I did well.