By: Caspian Bell

The shrill scream of the whistle sounded across the field

The game was done

The score was 0-20

The season was done

Our record was 0-9n

I slumped to the sidelines

Dripping in my sweat soaked clothes

And surrounded in a terrible stech


I sat on the cold metal bench

And yank off my helmet

The taste of gatorade sour in my mouth

As I listened to my coach

He tells us we did well

And that he is proud of us for giving it our all

But we all know that we failed


I pull of my constrictive safety gear

And stretch my sore muscles

Then I sludged off through the frigid night

And hoped the next season would be better







  1. Which poem type did you publish?

I published My sense poem.

  1. Answer the ONE question that goes with your poem type:

    1. Emotion Poem: Why did you choose this emotion?

    2. Sensory detail Poem: Why did you choose this event as the basis for your poem?

      I chosethis event because it is an event that is filled with differnt senses.

    3. Inspired by poem: What was the source of your inspiration (poem, song, issue)? Why?

    4. Nature/environment poem: Why did you choose this environment?

    5. Allegory: What is the literal meaning (story)? What is the figurative meaning?

    6. Ode: Why did you choose the subject of your ode?


  1. What is the tone of your poem?

The tone of my poem is despair.

  1. What is the theme of your poem?

The theme of my poem is defeat.

  1. Choose TWO examples of figurative language in the poem.

  1. Quote the figurative language:”cold metal bench”

  2. Type of figurative language: sensory details

  3. Explain how this figurative language contributes to tone and theme development: It suports the tome of despair by showing that the bench is uncomfortable

  1. Quote the figurative language:”shrill scream of the whistle”

  2. Type of figurative language: sensory detail

  3. Explain how this figurative language contributes to tone and theme development: It contributes to the tone of despair by seemin harsh.

  1. What are two specific ways you revised this poem? (Example: “I changed “happy” to “content.”) Why did you make these revisions?

Revision #1: I added a line about the stench of sweat soaked clothes.

Explanation: I did this to increase the amount of senses my poem appeals to and represent a overwhelming sense that you get after a football game.

Revision #2: I removed my original ending.

Explanation: I did this because it didn’t fit the tone of my poem.

  1. How easy or difficult was it to write this poem? Why?

It was easy to write this poem because I chose an event that is full of senses and that I renember well.

  1. How satisfied are you with your final draft? Explain.

    I am quite satisfied with my final draft because I put effort into it and I believe that it is a compelling poem.


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