poetry

hello wonderful readers!

this is a more relaxed post(lets not talk about the last post i made earlier today). I’m going to be sharing some poetry I’ve written throughout this school year. Keep in mind I’m not really that great at it and I don’t really have that ‘poetry pizazz’.

poems will be separated by _____

basically all of these are unfinished(most likely permanently but meh).

_________

my silence chitters

its wings fluttering softly

my tongue tastes metal

in the form of red liquid

yet somehow invisible when i look

my breath is quiet

no one can hear

anything but silence in the room

the silence is quiet

yet deafening

roars in my ears grow louder as the seconds pass

my ears feel they are bleeding

my eyes feel they are stinging

my heart feels it has stopped

a pair of eyes stare at me

into my soul

they see

my emotions

my heart

my struggle

and yet

and yet they say nothing

and I’m left

left with eyes

downturned and watery

I can’t look

can’t move my eyes upward

can’t make eye contact with them

it’s too much

I swallow dry air

my tongue sticks to the roof of my mouth

_______

my eyes downturned

i space out

i’m only half concious

of whats going on

loud voices skip by my ears

music blasts away my fears

my eyes stare solely

my limbs heavy

i feel like a corpse

i want to fall

endlessly

i wish i could sleep

endlessly

i want to fall face first into the desk

that i’m supposed to be working on

i wish i could sleep

as i listen to one song on repeat

my eyes water every time i yawn

i yawn every few minutes

endlessly

it never stops

i’m so tired

_______

trees fill my sight

my eyes absorb everything

as i hear the rustling of the leaves

the breeze

its there

brushing my face

blowing past my ears

scents of fruits and flowers are welcomed into my nose

as i sit on the dirt path

the path that traisl into the small forest outside my home

there are dandelions beside the trail

many of them

scattered around with grass all around them

my heart

the leaves tatter to the ground softly

down onto my head softly

the various shades of green and brown surround me

the chittering and noises made by the animals around me

ah

how i love fall feelings

_______

my breath puffs out into the chilly air

my eyes burn holes into the sight in front of me

the building

it’s a house

a home

he says its our new home

but that cant be

he has to be joking

i see no sign of humor in his face

hes serious

his words strike my heart viciously

and yet i smile and talk as though nothing is wrong

but everything is wrong

we would switch schools eventually

he tells us

how cruel

for my heart to be crushed at the thought

though its the best move

the best option

for everyone

for the family

how selfish of me

for my heart to clench in sadness and partial anger

at the fact that I will have to leave my friends

my friends

the ones i care for

they are everything

everything

and i am nothing

i often tell my friends

i exist

and i do

yet i feel as if i am not apart of this world sometimes

and other times, i feel like i am too involved in this world

how can ones emotions be so contradictory

and yet, so difficult to identify

that night, the sky is dark

its darkness envelops me while im in bed

its a great cover for my face

for my tears

the liquid tears that stream down my face as i ponder

______

i continue my work

writing numbers and more numbers

repetitively

they turn to me

and ask

are you okay

i dont know what they were thinking in that moment

i dont know how they could tell

that lately ive felt like the whole world was crushing me

i felt fine before they asked

but when they asked

it all came crashing down

my feelings

the ones id been trying to shove down and forget about

when the words come out of their mouth

tears sting at my eyes

appearing out of nowhere

so suddenly it surprised me

_______

my bags crash to the ground as i drop into the chair

my eyes sting

my heart jumps to my throat

my hands rise up to rest my head in them

my bones tremble

my fingers tremble as they lay on my head

covering me

shielding me as i let the tears come down

my breathing quickens

eyes fill up with endless tears

sight is blurry

throat is stuck

i shakily suck in sharp breaths

i know that if i dare open my mouth, sobs will rip themselves out of my chest

______

 

thats all the poetry i made that im sharing today!

 

thank you for reading !

drawing addict out~

Update

Hello everyone! I am back here again with an update on how things have been going. The week has gone by and my birthday was just last week on Tuesday. It is finally Friday, as well as the day before Halloween. I’m glad to say that my grades have gone back to normal and are in a pretty good state as of the end of the quarter. During quarantine, I’ve been spending my time drawing, cooking, singing, and doing lots of makeup(I swear, it isn’t healthy for me to do makeup this much). Since I’ve been thinking about my gender identity a lot, I’ve also been thinking about getting a binder(a chest binder). It is an exciting thought and I would love to get one. However, I have not said anything about how I have been feeling to my parents because I am worried that they will not understand or might think that I am just confused. So, I have a lot to think about before I do anything because even if I get a binder(without them knowing), they would surely notice my chest being flatter and all that.

Anyways, here is an update with COVID-19 that was last updated today, October 30th, 12:16 AM EST.

 

Total cases in the US:

8,924,548

Total deaths in the US:

228,100

Cases in the US in the last 7 days:

537,501

Deaths in the US in the last 7 days: 

228,100

Washington:

Total cases: 

105,557

Total deaths:

31

Idaho:

Total cases:

62,746

Total deaths:

35

Montana:

Total cases:

30,853

Total deaths:

31

North Dakota:

Total cases:

42,483

Total deaths:

67

Minnesota:

Total cases:

142,311

Total deaths:

44

Wisconsin:

Total cases:

11,709

Total deaths:

34

Michigan:

Total cases:

190,043

Total deaths:

76

Oregon:

Total cases:

43,793

Total deaths:

16

California:

Total cases:

912,904

Total deaths:

44

Nevada:

Total cases:

98,554

Total deaths:

58

Utah:

Total cases:

110,640

Total deaths:

18

Wyoming:

Total cases:

12,507

Total deaths:

15

South Dakota:

Total cases:

43,000

Total deaths:

45

Iowa:

Total cases:

122, 355

Total deaths:

53

Illinois:

Total cases:

400,171

Total deaths:

78

Indiana:

Total cases:

172,730

Total deaths:

63

Ohio:

Total cases:

208,937

Total deaths:

45

Pennsylvania:

Total cases:

202,876

Total deaths:

68

New York:

Total cases:

506,674

Total deaths:

368

Vermont:

Total cases:

2,155

Total deaths:

9

New Hampshire:

Total Cases:

10,768

Total deaths:

35

Maine:

Total cases:

6,570

Total deaths:

10

Massachusetts:

Total cases:

161,637

Total deaths:

143

Connecticut:

Total cases:

70,446

Total deaths:

129

Rhode Island:

Total cases:

32,312

Total deaths:

113

New Jersey:

Total cases:

234,547

Total deaths:

183

Delaware:

Total cases:

24,553

Total deaths:

71

Maryland:

Total cases:

144,314

Total deaths:

68

West Virginia:

Total cases:

23,466

Total deaths:

24

Kentucky:

Total cases:

103,305

Total deaths:

32

Missouri:

Total cases:

177,693

Total deaths:

47

Nebraska:

Total cases:

68,150

Total deaths:

33

Colorado:

Total cases:

102,014

Total deaths:

39

Arizona:

Total cases:

242,480

Total deaths:

82

New Mexico:

Total cases:

44,904

Total deaths:

47

Kansas:

Total cases:

82,045

Total deaths:

34

Oklahoma:

Total cases:

126,618

Total deaths:

33

Texas:

Total cases:

886,820

Total deaths:

62

Lousiana:

Total cases:

186,216

Total deaths:

126

Arkansas:

Total cases:

109,712

Total deaths:

62

Tennessee:

Total cases:

256,880

Total deaths:

48

Virginia:

Total cases:

179,639

Total deaths:

42

North Carolina:

Total cases:

269,021

Total deaths:

41

South Carolina:

Total cases:

174,591

Total deaths:

76

Georgia:

Total cases:

356,848

Total deaths:

75

Alabama:

Total cases:

189,149

Total deaths:

59

Mississippi:

Total cases:

119,336

Total deaths:

111

Florida:

Total cases:

784,331

Total deaths:

78

Alaska:

Total cases:

14,456

Total deaths:

10

Hawaii:

Total cases:

14,841

Total deaths:

15

 

That is the cases and deaths in each state in the US. Please stay safe and if you want to learn how to do that, check out my other post “The Issue on The Table”, which will give you a lot of steps to ensure the safety of you and everyone around you.

That’s all for this update.

Drawing Addict out~

Life Now

Hello everyone! I must admit that it has been a long while since I posted here on my blog. Today, I was just going to check my grades in school when this blog popped up as one of my past search results. So, this is just going to be a little check in post to make sure everyone is doing okay and to let you know how life is now for me. Eighth grade went by so quickly and now I am a Freshman in High School. Since quarantine started, I’ve gotten paler and I’ve lost freckles, which is super terrifying for me because my freckles are the one thing I rely on to look cute. Anyways, quarantine has been confusing, to say the least. I’ve been attempting to use this time to try and get to know more about myself and who I am as a person. I’ve even started experimenting with different pronouns. In fact, I have been currently using he/him pronouns for the time being until I finally decide on what pronouns I am going to use. My gender identity isn’t the only thing I have been thinking on. I have been questioning my sexuality for a while now, but I am proud to say that I have labeled myself as an Aromantic Asexual, meaning that I am not romantically, nor sexually attracted to anyone.

Moving on to a different topic, I’ll talk about school. I have to admit that school has been tough. I know that teachers are struggling just as much as students, but it feels like I have been getting loads of school work thrown at me with inadequate instructions and explanations on how to get it all done. I have so much work to do that I constantly get confused and forget about some specific assignments. It just lowers my grades more and more, but I’m hoping that my grades go back to normal since I have worked with my parents to create a manageable schedule for my school work. While this school year has started off tough, I am still hoping to be as productive as I can, from running for the Freshman Advisory Board to auditioning for the virtual fall play(though we don’t talk about it). Also, here is random news, but my parents have finally decided to get me braces, though I can’t say I am too excited. See, I have this large tooth that resides in the left side of my mouth that is higher up onto my gums than all my other teeth. The thing is, is that it makes a pretty cool vampire tooth, since it is so pointy, and I admit that I have grown attached to it since it has been there for a long time(a good couple of years). I am not sure if I am ready to say goodbye to it just yet.

I have to say this as well, I am getting sick, so I am not sure how that is going to go.

Anyways, that’s all for this post. I hope you all are doing well during times like these.

Drawing Addict out~

Affliction

Hello everyone! I have decided to share one of my stories that I wrote with you! This story is based off of a real life thing that happened to me. Of course, I made the story a little(or a lot) more dramatic than it actually was by using onomatopoeia and strong & enticing words. This is just part one of the story since I haven’t finished writing it yet.

Part One

Darric abruptly sat up in his bed, while the wind clashed against the trees outside. The tree smashed against his bedroom window, forming an obnoxiously loud BANG! Darric jumped out of his skin, almost falling off his queen sized mattress. Darric would toss and turn, never getting comfortable, never falling asleep. His body felt burning hot under the blankets, yet freezing cold at the same time. Darric threw the sheets off of himself, resulting in the heat disappearing, but as the heat left, the cold swooped in and increased tenfold. All he could feel was the freezing air in his room, sending shivers down his spine and then all was quiet. The wind’s cries grew silent, the consistent noise of the bathroom fan faded away, the snores of his older brother in the room next to him stopped, leaving only Darric.

From the silence, came a sound. Just a little sound, the sound of what seemed to be a beat, his heart beat. THUMP. THUMP. THUUMP. Darric stiffened, that wasn’t right, he thought. The sound was being prolonged each and every second he heard it. THUUUMP. THUUUMMP. THUUUUMMP. As he listened to the steady beats, he could not comprehend what he was feeling. The thumping grew louder with every second he spent in his bed, and with it, came something he did not expect, pain. It felt like it was splitting his head open, so Darric laid in bed, silently wishing the noise would go away. His affliction would not leave, no matter what he did, banging his head against the bed, smacking his hand against his ear, he would have to deal with this problem. Suddenly, the room didn’t seem so quiet anymore.

It was like the sound was in the room, controlling the silence and reversing it. Darric sat up on his bed, before he let his feet touch the fuzzy and rough carpet that filled his room. As he stood up on his wobbly legs, he held onto the door frame while the darkness of his room blinded him. He tripped out of the room, his feet getting caught in the carpet as he stumbled blindly in the darkness. He made his way to which he believed led to his parents room and with each step he took, the pounding in his ear only increased tenfold. He finally made it to his destination, gently pushing the door open. He tiptoed to the best of his ability into his parents room.

When he entered the room, he found the bathroom light on. He trekked over to the bathroom, shielding his eyes from the light. “Cathie?” He whispered to his step-mom. As she turned to face him, Darric’s father walked out of the closet. “Honey, what are you doing out of bed?” His step-mom asked with a concerned look on her face. “I- I can’t sleep. My left ear h-hurts.” Darric said, his eyes watering as he clutched his throbbing ear. His step-mom reached out and combed his hair affectionately. “Alright sweetie, we’ll check your ear in the morning. Now, you should get some sleep.”

Darric reluctantly trudged back to his room. He buried himself under the covers, ready to suffer through the night. He found himself unable to sleep again. His ear pained him too much. It hurt so much that he soon realized that there were tears streaming down his face. He couldn’t bear to just lay there the whole night. Once again, he hopped out of bed, sweat trickling down his face.

That’s all for Part One of my story! I hope you enjoyed this short distraction. I hope that this took your mind off of the current situation at hand with COVID-19 and stuff. Stay safe out there!

Drawing Addict out~

SBC 2019 Week 8/Reflection

Hey everyone! Drawing Addict here back again(guess who’s back, back again, shadys back). I am here with my week 8 post of the Student Blogging Challenge(SBC)! I know you’re excited(not) to see what this week’s post is about! This week’s post is really just a reflection of the SBC and all of that stuff. 

I have published 11 posts in total during these 8 weeks and I am so happy with all of the comments I have been getting on them. In fact, I even got a comment from a Tech Integrator! Some of my friends and teachers have also commented on my blog! I think the best post I have written is my Week Four post mainly because of the drawing I made and the story with it. In my opinion, that is one of my best drawings which is no small accomplishment because I have so many sketchbooks filled with drawings.

Blogging has changed my life for the better because of how much it has taught me. It has been so much fun and has helped me improve in my writing. I think I am going to blog for myself(plus maybe something to do with my name…) and not just for school. If you guys are interested in seeing that when it comes out, I will make a post about it. Thank you all for reading my posts and commenting! I am glad everyone enjoys my posts and I hope you will continue to enjoy them in the future!

Drawing Addict signing off~

SBC 2019 Week Five/Music

Hey everyone! Drawing Addict is back again with ANOTHER post and I know you are excited(I’m joking, you’re probably not) to see this week’s challenge! Here’s a wrap-up of last week; it was week four of the SBC and it was basically freestyle writing. Last week, I decided to use a writing prompt to make a short story(I also made a drawing for it and you know why.) Unfortunately, I did not have enough time to submit the link of my blog post into the google form, so I have to make up for it this week by getting this assignment over with. This week’s challenge was about music and there was a variety of options to choose from for it. You could make your own music, make a quiz about music, review music, write about an instrument, write about music and its downsides, and even making a playlist of music that you like. In this case, I wanted to be creative, so I made my own song(which, in my opinion, is really bad and too short[I don’t want to do it over again].)

 I decided to write a song about my Communications class and how amazing it is. Note that I am not a good singer and I am even worse at songwriting(so please don’t tell me how bad my song is.) My song is currently only made up of lyrics, but I will put in some ukulele in the background later to improve it. I hope you enjoy the song and I hope you like my drawing for this week(drawing the cover of the song.) I would also like to mention one more thing before I put the song. I don’t know how many times I have said this, but, once again, make sure you check out my classmates’ blogs(they are very amazing and innovative people that deserve recognition for their blogs/work!) The song will be down below along with some background information talking about how I struggled to make the song. 

 

While I was writing this song, I found myself struggling. I know I had chosen to make music, but it was harder than I thought. I always have catchy songs stuck in my head and it keeps me from making my own music because I am automatically putting those songs into my song. I also had no idea what to use for lyrics for the song so I had to write some good things about Communications and sing the words. It also does not help that I am really terrible at singing(at least, I think so. Other people tell me that my singing voice is better than average or is good[I don’t believe them though].) I was also using SoundTrap to make the music, but the thing is, is that SoundTrap is completely new to me. I have never used SoundTrap before this, so I did struggle with how to manage and work it. I managed to pull through though and I am happy that I am finally done with it. I hope you all liked this post and enjoyed this week’s challenge. That’s all for this week! Drawing Addict out~

P.S I will put in the drawing and background music in the song later~

P.P.S I just put in the background music in the song and I may have redid some recordings to make it sound better~

SBC 2019 Week Three Challenge/Fun With Photos

Hello everyone! This may seem a little early, but Drawing Addict is back again with another post! In this case, yes, it’s true, it’s Week Three of the Student Blogging Challenge! For this week’s challenge, we were assigned the job to do one of three things. 1. Take a photo of something in your surroundings. 2. Draw something and take a photo of it. 3. Use “Photos for Class” to find an image. Each one of my classmates chose one to do for the challenge. I just so happened to decide on doing a drawing(honestly, if you don’t know why, I am not even going to try to explain). If anyone is confused, you can just take a picture of a drawing you made a while ago, it does not have to be recent. I inserted a drawing of the Sorting Hat that I made sometime in September. The assignment stated that after we have an image, we had to put on a google doc and either write a story starter for it or write a poem. I, being the writer I am, decided to write a story starter. Obviously, it was about the Sorting Ceremony. If you really want to see the drawing and the story, it’ll be below for you to survey.

So this is my drawing of the Sorting Hat. It is not the best, but it was definitely something since I only worked on this drawing for about 5 minutes. Imagine if I did one of those things on youtube that are like drawings in 5 minutes vs drawings in 5 hours. I would probably do worse on the longer one than the shorter one. Anyway, the story starter is down below.

As the Sorting Hat sat rigidly on the round, rusty, old stool, the First Years finally arrived in the Great Hall. As name after name was called, the sorting hat was growing more and more exhausted. Finally, after waiting for about 20 minutes, the final student was called. “Talinian, Aidan!” From the crowd, came a young boy, whose eyes were darting around nervously as the whispers grew louder. The boy walked over to the stool, his whole body stiff from anxiety. The young boy gently set himself on the rough, splintered stool. ‘Well, well, well, what do we have here? Such a great mind, ambitious for sure… and.. Very loyal, I see…. Slytherin would help you find your destiny… but, Hufflepuff is just as promising….’ 

’Just put me in Hufflepuff.’ The boy thought to the hat, desperate. The boy held his breath as the Sorting Hat made its final decision. ‘Hmmm…. Better be…. SLYTHERPUFF!’ The Sorting Hat yelled, his voice echoing across the Great Hall. Silence filled the room, no one moved until at last, Headmaster Dumbledore stood up from his seat and trekked towards the nervous boy. He rested a hand on the boys shoulder as he spoke calmly, “It seems you are different. Don’t you worry, my boy. You will have a different set of Hogwarts’ robes. Do you know what this means? It means you are the bridge between Hufflepuff and Slytherin, you can help unify these two houses.” The young boy trembled as he stood up abruptly on his wobbly legs. He slowly trotted over to the Hufflepuff table and sat down at the end, away from all the others. 

Make sure you guys check out my classmates’ blogs in the links below!

That’s all for today, I hope you enjoyed my post and have a good week! Drawing Addict out~

Quick Post

Drawing Addict here with a quick and simple post! This is just something I wanted to input into my blog. To anyone who reads my blog posts, if you haven’t already checked out my classmates blogs, then you definitely should. Theirs are SO good, you’ll fall off your seat with amazement(I’m only kidding). Their posts are so descriptive and unique in their own way, they deserve more visitors for their blogs. You should see the links to their blogs at the bottom of the page. I hope any visitors on this blog go visit my classmates’ blogs. Thanks for reading! Drawing Addict out~

My Spidey Avatar

Drawing Addict is back with another post and an announcement! Week one of the Student Blogging Challenge is upon us! Up above is my spider-tacular Web Warrior, the coolest spider human in the world(just kidding, not really). My spidey senses are tingling, is yours? That’s right, if you haven’t guessed, my favorite color is purple. My favorite shade of purple happens to be lavender. As you can see, my Avatar has brown hair since it is obviously based off of me. I created this Web Warrior because I absolutely adore the different spideys, for example the Peter Parkers’, Miles Morales, Gwen Stacy, Peni Parker, Spider-Man Noir, and Spider-Ham. From my interests in the spideys, you should assume correctly that I am a huge Marvel fan. I have watched all of the movies created by Marvel and I absolutely love them! I am fanatic for Marvel, so please don’t ask me what my favorite is, since I love all of them(even Endgame and Infinity War, no matter how much it breaks my heart). I’d like to think that this avatar represents me the best, but I’m sure there are other avatars I could have made that would do better. I genuinely adore this avatar, whether the fact that it’s purple, or the fact that it is a spider human. Do avatars interest you? You can pop in to the slideshow below with all of the avatars made by my classmates! I am super excited for the Student Blogging Challenge! I can’t wait to see what is in store for me! You can take a look at the slideshow below to see a few other ideas on avatars for some inspiration for yours. If you want to make your own, I even put in a hyperlink on my slide that leads straight to some games. Enjoy!

Alphabet Aerobics(its actually a song)

This is my A-Z post! The randomest things about me: I absolutely love using Bitmoji for my character! I change the outfit of my character every now and then to make it match my outfit that I’m wearing for the day. Did you know that I sewed little Dementors for my birthday party this year? It’s going to be grand! I am planning to invite 20 of my friends because my stepmom didn’t allow me to invite more since I have too much friends! My birthday party is going to be the best thing ever! At least, the best birthday party that I will ever have. Every year, my birthday party is themed differently and it’s kind of a tradition for my family. My birthday party this year is going to be Harry Potter themed since I am a huge Potterhead! I am also inviting people to dress up as a Hogwarts student or as a character (if they want to) for my birthday party! 

Since it is sort of a costume party, I am going to dress up as Hermione Granger for it. My sister is going as Harry Potter since she has short hair and she is going to dye it black. Also, my brother is going to go as Ronald Weasley since he has orange hair and blue eyes. He is perfect for the role. I usually dress up as Hermione Granger each year since I feel connected with her and we are so much alike. Here’s something else about me. I desperately wanted to audition for Belle this year in Beauty and The Beast but I didn’t have the time to audition and stay after school for rehearsals. I feel like I would connect with Belle too since she is a huge bookworm like me. I just feel like I would be perfect for her role, although she wears dresses and I don’t. 

Fact about me: I don’t wear dresses unless it’s a special occasion, same goes with makeup unless it’s stage makeup. Many people do not like school that much, but I happen to be what my sister would call, a “goody-two-shoes”, since I am so jubilant for school each year! I usually get good grades and I love all my classes (except for the fact P.E is my least favorite)! I absolutely love reading and learning new curriculum each year, I just love absorbing knowledge! This is why some people think I’m weird, because I like to learn and I actually enjoy school. 

I love music, I already told you this fact but now here’s another one. I will practically listen to anything and I happen to be a world champion in memorizing lyrics in only a few days after listening to it. I already mentioned this but I am really loud in school, but I don’t need to be quiet to get good grades.

This reminds me of something my Civics teacher said. “You write just as much as you talk.” I don’t remember her exact words, but it was close to that. We had been working on the quiz for Fundamental Principals. I believe, but I don’t remember exactly, and we were doing it on paper copies. There were short answer questions and I answered them with a lot of words, so my teacher had pointed it out to me. She knew I talked a lot since I’m really loud and she can hear me from across the room and so she mentioned how my writing amount is exactly the same amount of words I speak. That cracked me up, I knew it was true too, so I couldn’t argue against it. That is something weird but unique about me. In fact, for all I know, my other teachers could possibly(*cough*) be annoyed at the volume of my voice during class(especially drama). 

Storytime! There was a time where I was mistaken for a boy and honestly, I get it. I was somewhere around, I don’t remember exactly, but I was young. I went to a school that required uniforms at that time. The uniform consisted of khaki shorts and a short sleeve shirt. Now, before I forget to mention, I had short hair, like a boy cut. We had come out of school and we had gone to eat, so we went to a pizza place nearby. We walked in, ordered our food, and sat in the booth, waiting for the food to arrive. 

I suddenly needed to use the bathroom, so I got up from the booth and walked to the girls’ restroom. Before I had fully entered the bathroom, I heard a boy say something behind me. I turned around and heard faintly, “Mom, look at that boy. He’s entering the girls’ bathroom!” I saw a little boy, around the age I was at the time. He and his mother were in the booth next to ours and he was pointing straight at me and telling his mother about me. He honestly thought I was a guy. This happened years ago, but I still remember it like it was yesterday. When I think about it now, it cracks me up, I realized that I have a neutral face, I can look like a girl or a boy.

Thanks for reading this (weird)A-Z post! Don’t forget to check out my classmates’ spectacular blogs, my classmates are very xenodochial! Yeah I think I’m done, zero more letters to go! 

dRaWiNg AdDiCt OuT~

 

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