In which the Monkey King is a jerk

Fearful of the armed monkeys, several other inhabitants of the Mountain joined their group. The Monkey King had a grand army and the trappings of a court, but still he was not satisfied. The sword he had taken after defeating the Demon King of Confusion was clumsy, and the weapons he had stolen were too weak for his taste. He asked the oldest monkeys for advice.

“The stream by the bridge leads to the palace of a powerful Dragon. If you ask it might have something that suits you.”

Sun Wukong departed hastily and swam to the palace, where he encountered a demon guard. “Who are you, and what power do you have that allows you to swim so fast?” The Monkey King told him, with more than a hint of indignation. The demon went to the dragon and described the encounter.

The dragon quickly prepared and invited Sun in. When asked of his business, he answered, “I have trained to become an Immortal and taught my family to fight, but I have not been able to find a weapon for myself. I heard of your great power and magnificent home, and thought you surely must have magical weapons to spare. I beg of you to help me.

The request was acceptable, so the dragon sent the general to bring back a giant sword. Wukong was dissatisfied, and refused the next offer-a spear weighing more than a ton-as well on account of insufficient weight. The host was disturbed by the nonchalant act, and had an even heavier halberd brought in.

It was still nothing to the monkey, which terrified the dragon. It desperately pled that there was nothing heavier in the palace. Before Sun Wukong responded, some of the dragon’s servants arrived. “Lord, the Anchor relic is glowing. Do you think it could be related to the visitor?”

The procession headed towards the treasury, wherein stood a thick pole several times the height of the Monkey King. It shone brilliantly as he approached and grabbed it, but still he complained the unwieldy size. As if it heard him, the rod shrunk to a comfortable size and dimmed so he could see it. Most of the cudgel was black iron except for two gold bands.

Sun Wukong was greatly pleased with the weapon and returned to the hall. Despite his professed gratitude, though, he wanted still more from the dragon. “I’ve got this cudgel, but I still don’t have the clothes to go with it. I’d be most obliged if you give me some armor.”

When confronted by the dragon’s insistence on lacking the desired armor, the monkey quickly resorted to threats. Filled with fear for its life, the host offered to invite other dragons to provide the suit.

When the dragons arrived and were explained the situation, one of them-Ao-raged to fight the Monkey King but was stopped by the first dragon’s description of his power. Another guest suggested that they provide the armor then report him to the Astral Council for punishment.

And that is how Sun Wukong bullied a dragon into giving him not only a powerful and versatile weapon but also a resplendent gold suit. He did not thank them for the gifts, of course; the cudgel was obviously meant to be his.


I claim no ownership of the image.

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