By: Ashley Walters
A peaceful shadow
had settled over the room.
I blinked comfortably,
though unsure of why I was awake.
A whimper caused me to startle,
propping myself on my elbows.
A shadow circled by my feet.
I watched it grow closer.
Soft fur brushed my arms
and my vision was blocked by black.
I extended my hand,
not used to her affection.
I was struck suddenly
by how hot the room was.
She was panting
and nudging herself under my arms.
My eyes blinked rapidly as tears welled up.
Was this how it would end for her?
Tucked under my arm and overheated?
I pulled her closer,
shutting my eyes as I hoped for the best.
- I published a sensory poem.
- I chose this event because it was a very emotional time for me.
- The tone of my poem is somber.
- The theme of my poem is the time when I was afraid my dog was going to die.
- Two examples of figurative language in my poem are “soft fur” and “how hot the room was.” “Soft fur” is touch imagery, and helps the poem by showing the reader the situation. “Hot hot the room was” is also tough imagery, and helps the poem by adding an undercurrent of being uncomfortable.
- Two ways I revised this poem is by changing “realized” to “struck” and “raised my head” to “startle.” Both of these revisions have negative connotations, and they fit better than words with neutral connotations.
- This poem was difficult to write because it was an event that was very personal to me.
- I am somewhat satisfied with my poem, because I like how the flow of the words works, but I do not think my word choice conveys the mood I had chosen.